THE BAD TOOTH GALLOWS
An MLPFIM Fan-script written by Julian Yeo
Twitter: @judacris judacris.tumblr.com
SCENE: Golden Oaks Library/Twilight's Treehouse
Twilight Sparkle analyses muffins on her desk. Measuring each out for weight and height. She records her findings, only to find one muffin missing.
Twilight: "Spike, did you see the muffin I had on the desk?"
Cut to Spike, visibly having something in his mouth.
Twilight: "Spike. Did you eat that muffin?"
Twilight: "Oh, Spike. I needed that for my very delicate research!"
Spike: "And I needed that as my very delicate dessert! Why are you doing research on muffins anyway?"
Twilight: "These aren't just ordinary muffins, Spike. These are muffins from Sugarcube Corner. I'm trying to find out what makes them so very delicious among ponies in Ponyville."
Spike: "Why don't you just ask the Cakes, or Pinkie Pie?"
Twilight: "I'm sure the Cakes have some secret family recipe they can't reveal, and I can't get a fair response from Pinkie Pie since she likes everything from Sugarcube Corner. Besides, doing research and coming up with my own findings is fun!"
Spike: "Delicious fun." (Spike scarfs down another muffin, to Twilight's annoyance) "Hey, do you think you could experiment on brownies next?"
Twilight rolls her eyes and sighs.
(Opening theme sequence)
SCENE: Sugarcube Corner
Twilight Sparkle walks into the confectionary, up to Mrs. Cake, who is manning the till.
Twilight: "Hi, Mrs. Cake."
Mrs. Cake: "Oh, hello. Twilight. What can I do for you today?"
Twilight: "I'd like another batch of your delightful muffins, please."
Mrs. Cake: "Oh, I'm afraid we're out of muffins for the moment, Twilight, but it won't take long for Pinkie to have a fresh batch ready if you'd like to wait."
Twilight: "Not a problem. I'll go see if Pinkie could use some help."
Twilight heads to the kitchen to see Pinkie Pie hard at work on a new batch of muffins. She stirs the batter, fills the trays and tosses them skilfully into the oven.
Twilight: "Hey, Pinkie Pie."
Pinkie Pie: "Oh, hey Twilight. Here for another batch of muffins?"
Twilight: "Yup. Mrs. Cake said you were whipping up another batch, so I'm here to see if I could help."
Pinkie Pie: "Oh, it's alright, Twilight. (Pinkie brings a fresh batch of cooled muffins onto the counter) I'm almost done here. I just have to do a... (hesitant) taste... test on these muffins before they go out."
Pinkie Pie picks up a muffin to sample as Twilight looks on. Pinkie Pie takes an unusually feeble nibble. Twilight gives Pinkie a puzzled look. A suddenly insecure Pinkie attempts a bigger bite out of the muffin. Pinkie Pie winces, mouth full of muffin.
Twilight: "Pinkie Pie, are you alright?"
Pinkie Pie: (speaking with her mouth full) "Mm-hmm. These are some (she winces) good muffins."
Pinkie Pie winces some more. Tears well up in her eyes.
Twilight: "Pinkie Pie, are you sure you're okay?"
Pinkie does a weak "mm-hmm". An unconvinced Twilight moves up to her, and gently taps Pinkie's cheek. Pinkie winces again, strongly this time.
Twilight: "Hmm... Pinkie, could you open your mouth for me?"
Pinkie does so, mouth still full of muffin.
Twilight: "Swallow first, Pinkie."
Pinkie swallows the muffin with difficulty and reopens her mouth, but Pinkie Pie winces once more and refuses to keep it open.
Twilight: "Oh, Pinkie! I think you have a bad tooth!"
Pinkie Pie: (moves away from Twilight) "I know! I've had it since Thursday!"
Twilight: "You need to get it seen by a dentist!"
Pinkie Pie: "Are you crazy?! Do you know what a dentist does to ponies with a bad tooth!?"
Pinkie Pie: (interrupts) "They'll send you to the Bad Tooth Gallows! They'll chain you up and get the bad tooth out through the most painful way POSSIBLE!"
Twilight: "They'll what? Pinkie, I don't think dentists-"
Pinkie Pie: (interrupts again) "Oh, I know you're worried, but I'm never going to the dentist. The Bad Tooth Gallows would be too much for me. Have your muffins, Twilight, while you still can. It's too late for Pinkie."
Pinkie Pie becomes forlorn, fumbling with a lone muffin, while a helpless Twilight looks on, before her face lights up with one of her signature ideas.
Twilight: "I have an idea! Why don't I help you check out that tooth so we don't have to go to the dentist? Would that help?"
Pinkie Pie: "I guess that would be okay. Do you have a spell you could use?"
Twilight: "Not exactly, but I have books on the subject. Those are just as good, right?"
Pinkie Pie: (rolls eyes unconfidently towards herself) "If you say so..."
SCENE: Golden Oaks Library/Twilight's Treehouse
Twilight and Pinkie Pie enter Twilight's Treehouse. Spike is carrying books around.
Spike: "Hey, Pinkie Pie. Say Twilight, where did you say you wanted these books again?"
Twilight: (ignores question) "Perfect, Spike. (lifts book from top of the stack) This is exactly what I needed!"
Spike gives off a puzzled look as Pinkie and Twilight trots past him. Twilight opens and flips through the book.
Twilight: "Here. 'Chapter Seven: Pouts and Grouts' (Twilight skims the chapter) Hmm, I could do that... (continues reading) Ooh, I have one of those. (continues reading) Well, this doesn't seem too hard. We just have to do one teensy thing."
A transition occurs. The camera focuses on Twilight as the background visibly changes from the Treehouse to Twilight's underground laboratory. We then see Pinkie Pie strapped to an operating table propped upright.
Pinkie Pie: (concerned) "Are you sure about this, Twilight?"
Twilight: "Of course I'm sure, Pinkie. Now hold still. This will be over quick."
A ray of magic is shot from Twilight's horn. Pinkie flinches and the beam gets reflected off the metal operating table, bouncing off the ceiling before hitting one of the laboratory's wooden counters, creating a hole where it struck. Cut to Pinkie and Twilight, who both have a stunned look.
Twilight: "Oh-kay. Let's try that one more time, but it's really important you stay still, Pinkie."
Pinkie Pie whimpers, helplessly fastened to the operating table. Twilight's horn warms up again to ready another bolt of magic. Cut to Pinkie Pie's face, pupils shrinking in fear, cut to Twilight's horn, cut to Pinkie's eyes, cut to a close-up of Twilight's horn. Pinkie Pie, who can no longer handle the tension, pops out of her restraints and briefly floats in the air, screaming:
Pinkie Pie: "I CAN'T DO THIS, TWILIGHT!"
before bolting out of the laboratory.
Twilight: "Pinkie, WAIT! Oh, what have I done?"
(end of act one)
Pinkie Pie, who freaked out and ran off, has apparently gone into hiding, evident by a guilty-feeling Twilight's search attempt around town.
Twilight: (looking around) "Pinkie Pie! ... Pinkie Pie! Oh, where could she be?"
She continues searching around the streets of Ponyville, calling out "Pinkie Pie" as she goes, eventually meeting Applejack and Rainbow Dash by AJ's apple stand.
Applejack: "Howdy, Twilight. Something wrong?"
Twilight: "Unfortunately, yes. See, I think Pinkie Pie has a bad tooth, and I tried to help by using magic to ease it out, but the stress of my experimentation was too much for Pinkie and she ran off!"
Rainbow Dash: "She ran off?"
Twilight: "Yes, and I have no idea where she is! Have you two seen her?"
Applejack: "Not recently, but Rainbow Dash and I will be happy to help you find her, right Rainbow?"
Rainbow Dash: "Yep! Just leave it to us!"
Twilight and Applejack split off as a search party while Rainbow Dash performs an aerial search flying solo. They all look through various locations at every corner of Ponyville, still calling out "Pinkie Pie" as they go.
Cut to Rainbow Dash, who is hovering beside a tree.
Rainbow Dash: "Pinkie Pie... (scritches mane) Where could she be?"
And Rainbow Dash, giving out a "whoa!", is suddenly pulled into the tree by a pink hoof. Rainbow Dash is slightly dazed, and Pinkie Pie is revealed to be hiding in an inconspicuous treehouse atop that very tree.
Rainbow Dash: (dazed) "Ugh..." (sudden realisation) "Pinkie Pie! There you are!"
Pinkie Pie: "Yes, you found me. Or rather, I dragged you in here. So technically I found you, which is actually kinda silly since you were looking for me."
Rainbow Dash: "Why are you hiding up here? We've been looking all over for you!"
Pinkie Pie: "Because I'm too afraid to get my tooth fixed."
Rainbow Dash: "Why?"
Pinkie Pie: "Haven't you heard about the Bad Tooth Gallows?"
Rainbow Dash: "The what?"
Pinkie Pie: "It's the place where ponies with bad teeth are sent! They'll get my bad tooth out but the pain will be so great, I will never taste anything ever AGAIN! I'll lose my job at Sugarcube Corner! (suspenseful sting) My life will be ruined!"
Silence falls upon a distraught Pinkie Pie and a visibly unimpressed Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow Dash: "Pinkie Pie, that's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. There's no such thing as the Bad Tooth Gallows."
Pinkie Pie: "There... Isn't?"
Rainbow Dash: (sighs) "Look, Pinkie, I had a bad tooth once, and I was afraid too. But I got it checked by a dentist and it turned out to be nothing serious. And by the end of the week, it got all better! I actually had nothing to worry about!"
Pinkie Pie: "R-really?"
Rainbow Dash: "Really. It's a better idea to have that checked, Pinkie. Trust me."
Pinkie Pie maintains her concerned look, before she's convinced and says:
Pinkie Pie: "Okay, I will. Thanks, Rainbow Dash."
Rainbow Dash, pleased for Pinkie Pie, grins.
Rainbow Dash: "C'mon. (prepares to crawl out of the treehouse) No one else knows we're up here. Twilight and AJ are probably still looking for you. Let's find them and let them know you're okay."
SCENE: Ponyville Town Square
Twilight and Applejack are still on their search when they see Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash trotting towards them.
Twilight: (surprised, relieved) "Pinkie Pie! Oh, Pinkie, I'm so sorry I scared you off with what I tried earlier."
Pinkie Pie: "It's okay, Twilight. You were only trying to help. *I'm* sorry I caused you all to worry."
Applejack: "We're just glad you're safe, Pinkie."
Pinkie Pie suddenly winces, hoof to cheek at the point of pain.
Twilight: "Oh, Pinkie, what are you going to do about the pain? You can't just live with it forever!"
Pinkie Pie, hoof still to cheek, glances at Rainbow Dash, who smiles reassuringly at her.
Pinkie Pie: "(sighs) I guess I'll have to get it seen by... a dentist."
Twilight: (deeply concerned) "Are you sure about that?"
Pinkie Pie: "Yes. I've thought about it. It's for the best."
Applejack: "Good for you, sugarcube."
Rainbow Dash: "And I know just the pony you'll be seeing. C'mon!"
(end of act two)
SCENE: Ponyville Hospital
Wide-shot of Ponyville Hospital. Cut to Twilight, Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie, who are seen waiting inside, seated outside a dental clinic. Nurse Redheart walks by past them.
Suddenly, the clinic door opens. We see Derpy Hooves leave with a mouth full of cotton (as the usual cameo appearance). Angel Bunny appears by the door, peers at the gang, then signals them to go inside.
The ponies do, confused. They look around the dimly lit room, noticing one particular hovering pegasus ahead of them, holding a clipboard. She speaks:
Mysterious Pegasus: "Well, what seems to be the problem today?"
She spins around out of the shadows, revealing herself to be...
Twilight, Applejack, Pinkie Pie: "FLUTTERSHY!?" (Fluttershy is shocked)
Twilight: "Fluttershy, you're the dentist?"
Fluttershy: "Well, yes. I take care of so many animals at my cottage, I eventually picked up the skills to help them treat their dental woes. And now I volunteer at Ponyville Hospital from time to time."
Applejack: "But have you worked on actual ponies before?"
Fluttershy: "Oh, yes. Well, just one."
Twilight, Applejack, Pinkie Pie: "Who?"
Rainbow Dash: "(zoom to close-up) Me. (pause) See...
I came here back then to have my bad tooth checked out, but the dentist couldn't figure out what was wrong. Until Fluttershy came along and noticed a splinter on my gum. She gently removed it in this very room. And I was done and back to normal within the week!
(Rainbow Dash grabs Fluttershy by the shoulder as Fluttershy hugs her clipboard, bashful.)
So if Pinkie Pie is going to have to see a dentist, why not let that dentist be Fluttershy?"
Twilight and Applejack smile and nod in agreement, facing Pinkie Pie.
Pinkie Pie: "I'll do it."
Fade out, then in to various angles of Pinkie Pie sitting in Fluttershy's dentist's chair, with no visible restraints.
Fluttershy proceeds to work on Pinkie Pie. Cut to shots of dentistry tools and Pinkie Pie. Fluttershy calls out for specific tools, which Angel Bunny hands to her. Fluttershy brings tools near Pinkie Pie, but Pinkie whimpers as Fluttershy does so, causing a situation where Fluttershy is also too afraid to proceed. Another tool is brought up instead, but Pinkie Pie clenches her teeth shut.
Cut to Fluttershy contemplating her next move and then sighing out a stern face before deciding to bring a scalpel-like tool close to Pinkie Pie's mouth, of which we get a shot of, before it cuts to a wide-shot of Ponyville Hospital and fades off.
SCENE: Ponyville Hospital - Ward
Twilight, Applejack and Rainbow Dash walk up to Pinkie Pie's bed with Fluttershy, where Pinkie has just been reviewed by a doctor.
Twilight, Applejack and Rainbow Dash: "Hey, Pinkie Pie."
Twilight: "How're you feeling?"
Pinkie Pie: (muffled speech)
Fluttershy realises the situation and yanks out a wad of cotton out from Pinkie Pie's mouth. Pinkie Pie speaks as Fluttershy realises the cotton wad is damp from drool before tossing it aside.
Pinkie Pie: "I'm feeling so much better now, and it's all thanks to Fluttershy."
Applejack: "What happened in there?"
Pinkie Pie: "Fluttershy had a lot of scary tools in there, but I told myself not to panic! Fluttershy started poking around, trying to find the exact problem, but then she couldn't! She was getting all nervous and then I was nervous and I didn't know what to do..."
Fluttershy: (interrupts) "Pinkie Pie had a little nut stuck between her teeth that was causing the pain, so I just took it out with my tweezers!"
Twilight, Applejack and Rainbow Dash: "Ohhh..."
Pinkie Pie: "Aww, I would've told the story better!"
Pinkie Pie pouts. The girls all laugh.
As Twilight begins narrating her letter, we cut to outside of Ponyville Hospital, where Pinkie Pie is seen discharged and leaving the premises with Twilight, Applejack and Rainbow Dash. Pinkie Pie hugs Rainbow Dash gratefully for her advice from the treehouse as they trot back to Ponyville together.
Twilight: "Dear Princess Celestia,
My friend Pinkie Pie has learnt that facing one's fears and going at it alone can be tough. But when she opened up and got her friends involved, she managed to overcome her deepest fears and see that things may not always be as bad as it seems, something we can all learn to do.
Your faithful student,
(fade, closing credit sequence)
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic & Original Characters © Hasbro